Bereavement Pain - Mourning A Cherished Pet

You may already be familiar with my Hubpage articles that I have written about dealing and/or coping with Chronic/Acute Pain. I personally endure a daily battle with Pain and have done so for a very long time but today I find myself writing about a very different kind of pain, one that I have never experienced before - the pain of saying farewell to a cherished pet.

I find myself sitting at my desk in my home office, my fingers hovering above the laptop keyboard with a thousand-and-one thoughts buzzing about inside my head, yet I find that I am somewhat daunted by the task at hand of writing this particular new hub article.

Why? Because I can sense that I am missing something!

I have my article topic sorted and I know pretty much what I want to say in my hub-article without over-personalizing it, so what's the matter, why the hesitation?

Tears start streaming down my already red-blotched face as I am confronted with the answer when I reach down to pat my cherished pet dog as I realize that my beloved best-mate is no longer there and it is him that I am missing as he is always at my feet but not today, tomorrow or ever again!

At that moment I am over-wrought with extreme pain, unlike anything that I have ever experienced before and this pain is very very different to the usual pain that I am accustomed to dealing with on a daily basis.

This pain is Bereavement Pain and it really really hurts ... more than I could ever imagine that it would and nothing could have prepared me for the real pain of saying farewell to my cherished companion of fifteen years.

Bereavement means to be robbed, deprived of life, hope etc, to be left desolate (in death).

Pain means to be bodily or mentally suffering, a penalty or punishment.

Bereavement Pain must then mean someone who is feeling robbed and desolate, deprived of many things who in turn penalises/punishes themselves by suffering of body and mind. Grief-stricken by guilt, loss and cherished memories.

I know that what I am feeling will pass given time and that my little mate would not want me adding to the pain-load that I already have to deal with but I absolutely need to feel this extra burden.

Why?

As my way of acknowledging everything that my unconditionally-loving animal-friend ever did for me and my family.

He was more than just a dog or just a pet, he really and truly was a member of our family and I absolutely feel that I have lost more than just a dog or pet - this is obviously why his passing hurts so much.

My Jack Russell called Oscar aka 'Little-Big Man" was constantly by my side. It was his mission to 'protect his mum' and he took this role seriously (especially when I was pregnant - no-one was allowed near me, not even my husband, without his approval first).

He could read my moods/body language and knew exactly when I needed him for an extra hug or cuddle. Even in his later years as he struggled with Arthritic pain himself, he would still want to be picked up and held onto, even if only briefly.

He was always there (and now he is not). He helped me in so many many ways and I am ever so grateful. He witnessed my good days and my not so good days coping with long term pain and he always knew when his mum needed comforting.

He was treated like royalty because he deserved it right up until his final breath with him outstretched in my arms with his heart against mine and his head upon my chest. He was my 'loyal royal', my 'little prince', my 'foot-soldier' and he will continue to be loved in death as he was in life.

Thank you Oscar, my little animal-friend for loving me so much. You will always be in my heart and one day we'll catch up with one another at Rainbow Bridge.

As my family and friends heard of Oscar's death they offered messages of support and goodwill.

I noticed that in quite a few of these messages that Rainbow Bridge was mentioned and for those who really know me, know that I just love Rainbows (one reason for studying Colour Therapy) and so I was naturally curious to find out more information about Rainbow Bridge.

This is just a small piece of what I found out ... (copied from the website - http://www.petloss.com/rainbowbridge.htm)

"Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.

There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.

There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.

The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers.

Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again.

The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown..."

So this is what I have to look forward to then ... Oscar and Rainbow Bridge.

Just that thought in itself helps bring a smile to my face.

Everyone will deal with their loss and bereavement differently and Bereavement Pain will eventually go away.

It does not require any medication just patience and time.

We must allow ourselves the energy and time to grieve for our loss as well as the energy and hope that enables us to move forward with our grief.

No matter what pet/animal-friend we have lost, we must honour their life and death by feeling the pain of bereavement but with that said, we must also find some bereavement pain-relief by remembering our cherished memories of them.

I truly appreciate the time that you have spent reading my Hub Article and I hope that you have found it to be beneficial.
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UrsulaRose

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